Unavailable
by Icefox19
Summary: Under Twilight Category for the sake of having somewhere to categorize. Based on what I'm living now. I'm just looking for advice on what I should do for all this.
1. Chapter 1

So, there's this guy….

That's how it always starts isn't it? There's always a guy involved. Always. For most of us, that can be good. And for others of us, that can be bad. For me, that was bad. You see, my guy, he's a senior. I'm a freshman. He's got a girlfriend. I'm totally in love with him. He's leaving for the Marines in 6 months. I have 6 months to win his heart. I'm doubtful, but maybe….just maybe….

"Carter, come here. You have to meet him." I dropped my backpack onto the couch of my best friend Lili (LeeLee) 's couch. I followed her into the kitchen, grabbing a Twix from the pile of leftover Halloween candy, sitting on the table. I sat on the bench and stared at the guy in front of me. He was about 6 foot tall and his hair was long and straight up, a little gel holding it in place.

He smiled at me, gave a single head jerk to say 'hey' and turned back to the computer in front of him. I sighed, my heart giving a little flutter. It was starting again. This happens every time. I fall in love with the guy my best friend is in love with. I always do. Sometimes I'm able to hide it, more often than not actually. But this was going to be different. It was going to be waaaaaay different.

"Carter, watch this!" Lili smiled at me then turned to the guy. "Kyle, tell her about how small we are compared to the universe." The guy turned to look at me. He smiled once and then launched into this explanation of how we're completely tiny compared to the universe and how everything Morgan Freeman had ever said about how big the universe was, was completely right. I only heard half the words flying from his mouth. The other half of words were coming out but I didn't comprehend.

I stared into his eyes, my face taking on a weirded out face. I had to make them believe I was listening to say but it was really just too hard to focus on what he was saying. I couldn't look away, I couldn't. I stared at him, trying to figure him out. I got nothing, no readings, no thoughts, no feelings from him except that when he's trying to prove a point, he likes to cuss, no boundaries on what he's saying.

After he was done freaking out, I smiled, laughed and said, "Oh woooooooow." I stood up, grabbed another piece of candy and headed out to the living room to check my phone, seeing if my mom was on her way to pick me up yet. I sat down next to my backpack and looked at the T.V., watching it and thinking of him at the same time. He sat down next to me, but farther down the couch.

Lili came and sat in between us. I tried hard to keep my eyes on the screen, and not turn to look at him, to study him more. Finally, he spoke, "You're hiding something."

I turned to look at him, making sure he was talking to me. "Wait, what? Me?" He nodded and I shook my head. "No I'm not." Kyle stared at me, his eyes narrowing, a slight smirk on his face and nodded.

"Yes you are." I laughed, nervous, excited and butterflies going crazy in my stomach. I shook my head again.

"No, I'm not." Kyle nodded again.

"I've taken psychology for the last three years. I'm very good at reading people. And yes. You are." I shook my head, laughing.

"Fine, if you're so good at reading me, what are you getting right now?" I asked. "Figure me out in under two minutes." He smiled and nodded.

"Okay," He stared at me and I blushed under his gaze. He shot up from sitting back, quickly. "You're fourteen years old, you're a freshman. You have a bad past and you have a lot of anger and sadness in you. You can't tell many things to many people because you find it hard to trust people. You smile so people don't sense your pain and you plan on having a bright future to forget about your past, and," He paused and smiled brightly for effect. "You're hiding something."

I felt my mouth drop open then I snapped it shut and dropped my gaze. I was no longer smiling. That's when I started feelings things from him, as I gathered up my stuff. I pulled on my sweatshirt and picked up my bag. He was feeling helpless, he felt like he'd hurt me, or upset me, as I left quickly. As my mom pulled up in the drive way, I turned back. "Okay," I told him, staring directly at him and nowhere else. "I'm hiding something. I'll give you that. Now the question is, what?"

I walked out of the door, like a boss, but feeling crappier than ever, keeping a smile on my face as I got into the car.


	2. Chapter 2

For the next couple weeks, he wasn't really a part of my life. I saw him in the halls every now and then but he had no real significance. I said hi, every where and after awhile, he started hitting me whenever he saw me in the halls. Of course my heart would start beating, but I ignored it. What could I do? Then, I found out he's leaving for the Marines.

He couldn't. He just couldn't. "Hey Car?" I heard someone yell over the hustles and bustle of the everyday High School. I turned around to see Lili trying to catch up to me. I stopped and waited. "Hey so Kyle was over again yesterday. He was totally nice to me. Car, I'm falling in love with my brothers best friend." I smiled, my heart beating.

"Oh, that's cool." I listened to her for the next couple days rant about him. One day. I turned to my friend, Tequila, (Her parents must have been drunk or stoned when they named her) and said, "We have to find out if he likes her."

"Alright," Tequila responded, "Get her phone, we'll get his number and I'll text him." That weekend, we had a sleepover at Tequila's.

(That Weekend)

"Lili, let me see your phone. Here's my Ipod." I handed her my ipod and took her phone, quickly flying through her contacts and landing on Kyle's contact. I leaned over so I was practically in Tequila's lap. "Tequila! Tequila! Look!" I whispered. I jerked her head up so her gaze was on the phone and we stole Kyle's number quickly and unknowingly to Lili.

Later, I texted him from her phone. "Hey Kyle, it's Carter."

"Oh, hey." We went back and forth. I explained to him how she felt about him and he quickly retaliated. "No, I don't date freshman. They're too young for me. And I know how she feels. I've known for awhile." I tried convincing him that they were the perfect match, even though my heart was breaking all the while.

After that, we started a new tradition. Everyday after lunch, we walked to choir, Kyle's class, and waited for him to be released for class. We stood there, each of us giving him a hug before he took off again. I hugged him and everytime, I would freeze up, my heart beating hard and loud. I was surprised he couldn't hear it or feel it. I always had to tear my arms from him and everytime he would look at me, smile and walk away. I couldn't stand it.

I started texting him from my ipod, not having a phone yet myself and we got into some deep conversations. I told him everything, my secrets, how I felt about certain things, just everything. He knows everything about me. One night, I asked him if he knew how I felt. He asked what about you.

"How I feel about you." I said. He took a few minutes before he replied but when he did, he said he had a pretty good idea. He figured me out. Figured out all of me. I told him everything, how I felt about him, summed up in four words. "I can't lose you." He understood. Someway, somehow, he got me. He got what I meant. The next day, he made it apparent he'd been texting me and Lili and Tequila and our other friend Mojo. He'd been talking to all of us. Tequila was weird when it came to him. She didn't like hugging him, instead, "sharing brainwaves". Everyday, she pressed her forehead against his, staring into his eyes. She got closer to kissing him than I think I ever will. But he appeared in front of us, in a VERY happy mood. "Make it quick ladies," He smiled, his arms out wide, ready for a group hug.

Nope. I was getting him to myself. I hugged him alone that day, and he pressed me to him, his lips settling lightly on the top of my head. That's when it REALLY started.


	3. Chapter 3

That's when it really got started. We started talking more and more. That November, 8 months before he was leaving for bootcamp, he was getting ready for our choir concert at Lili's. He was heading to his car, heading home to get something. He had a terrible limp having hurt himself but was enthusiastic none-the-less. "Oh, and by the way, there's one girl in your group of four that I think is cute."

All our mouths dropped when we heard. We fought an entire week and then figured out that it was Mojo. My heart shattered into a million pieces. He comforted me, saying it wasn't my fault, that he doesn't like her, he just thinks she's cute. But in my book, it's the same thing. I went home that night and cried. I just bawled.

It was horrible. Of course, Mojo gloated about it. She loved the fact that she was a superior to us. I told him that and he said he was sorry I felt that way. I agreed, of course and I told him I was pretty much done with her. He, on the other hand, try convincing me otherwise. He told me that by letting her go as a friend, I showed her just how much it hurt me that he'd picked her. I couldn't do that.

I always have to have the upper hand. Always. And though he said it wasn't a competition, that no one REALLY has the upper hand, I disagreed and continued to be strong, even though inside, I was breaking. And he knew this. He always knew how I was feeling.

Eventually, we got over it. She stopped gloating, but we always tried to top each others stories of what he said, or did. She and Lili always won of course. Lili's mom, she seems to hate me. She has it out for me. But Mojo was her "adopted daughter" figuratively speaking. She loves Mojo more than she loves her own daughter. So, of course, she let Mojo over there more than me. And Kyle is always over there. Always.

So, of course, they had more stories than I did. I managed to get over that though. Kyle was looking for ME in the hallways, he was looking for ME whenever he was in a class I was in. His eyes sought ME out. Not them. ME.

After awhile of talking, I felt like I was getting somewhere with him. Then one day I was texting him and he wasn't texting back. For the life og me, I couldn't figure out why. I asked Lili and she told me he was on a date. My heart shattered more but I could I saw it coming. He and that same girl, are now boyfriend and girlfriend. He still acts the same. Today, 6 months before he leaves for the Marines, I was in the Senior Commons. I was making fun of his girlfriend (she's really nice, we have nothing against each other, just little flaws) when he looked over at me. I froze and stared back at him.

He watched me. I smiled, waved and mouthed, "I didn't do it….." He laughed lightly and looked away, knowing perfectly well what I was saying and doing. I went back to making fun of her and then the bell rang. I headed out to the hallway where me and Mojo waited to see him, making fun of his girlfriend. As he got closer, he watched me, not Mojo, he watched ME, while holding hands with his girlfriend. As he past me, he stared directly into my eyes and stuck his tongue out at me.

An 18-year-old guy, 6 months from leaving to go to the MARINES, stuck his tongue out at me. I stuck my tongue out at him and we both laughed before going our separate ways. He's now in the process of doing his little psychological figure out thing that he did 6 months ago. I don't know if he's messing with me, if he actually has feelings for me or what. I don't know what I should do. Someone help?


End file.
